Yoga lessons from Gray Golden

Barry and I consider yoga to be a big part of our lives.  I have been attending classes 3-4 times per week for over 3 years and I feel like it has changed my life.  Not only is it a great way to build strength and endurance, it is also an amazing way to view the world.  The basic premise of yoga is to focus on the present moment.  Whether it is joyful or painful, it is important to stop and observe what you are feeling in the moment and experience it.  Yoga provides the wisdom to know that each moment is transient.  If you let your past experiences or future plans take over your thoughts (like most of us do) you will miss what is right before you.  I believe that this is an attitude we all should aspire to.

For Gray (and many children with autism), this is not an aspiration.  This is a reality.  From a very young age, Gray has naturally assumed yoga postures. At any given moment, he might be sitting in full lotus or stretching in a downward dog, or kicking up into a handstand preparation.  I believe that something inside of him knows when he needs to experience the sensation of these postures and his flexible little body just goes there.  Gray does not plan for the future and he does not dwell in the past.  He just is.  Right here.  In the present.

When Zoe lost her first tooth, it was a very stressful experience.  She would alternate between excitement and panic.  She would wiggle the tooth and light up with hope that it might come out and then she would get hysterical if there was any blood or pain.  For days, it consumed her.  What would happen?  Would it be disgusting? Would buckets of blood poor out of her mouth?  Would the tooth fairy bring a fortune?  Our whole house was on-edge waiting for the big moment.

When Gray lost his first tooth, it was a very different experience.  First, it was wiggly, then it was VERY wiggly. He would push at it with his tongue or touch it with his fingers, but his interest was short-lived and the prospect of a wiggly tooth didn’t concern him much.  He had no fear or expectation attached to the event, it was just a new situation and sensation that he noticed and moved on.  Eventually, it just got so wiggly, it fell out during lunch.  He calmly handed the tooth to me and kept on eating.  There was no blood and no drama.  It made me think about how often we make events so much more stressful than they need to be.  How many situations have fallen short of our expectations, both good and bad?  The planning and excitement for some fabulous event falls short.  The anxiety and the hand-wringing for some unpleasant event turns out to be unwarranted.

We all encounter situations that we have no control over.  We often make ourselves crazy trying to DO something or calculate our reactions.  We could all benefit from a little less struggling.  A little less planning.  Just observing and experiencing. This moment will pass.  In the meantime, just BREATHE!